Hey, I R A DJ

When I first got into radio, to get your third-class radiotelephone license with endorsement (mandatory if you were ever left to be alone at the station), you had to take a test. You were required to know the intracices of how a station puts their signal on the air, be able to mathematically determine the power output of the transmitter by reading meters….and you had to sign a log which was sent to the FCC for every hour you were “on duty” with required meter readings every three hours. It was kind of an honor to get your “ticket”, as they say….because if you REALLY wanted to be in the business, you had to understand the electronic and atmospheric logistics before you ever got to be left alone in a studio. It was a very complicated (at least for most 14 year-olds) test….I remember taking it with another guy from Klamath. You had to drive to Portland to take the test. I passed it….he failed it. These days, computers take the readings and will alert you if the transmitter is not operating under the guidelines set for your particular station. Turnabout is fair play, of sorts though. He’s now doing mornings in Los Angeles/San Bernardino. Brian also drove a Camaro, and was four years older than me. It was easy to hang with him. Never a dull moment. These days, the deregulation of the FCC has made it such that if you want your third class operator license with endorsement, you must pay them the fee, promise you’re over 14 and a legal citizen of the United States, and speak and understand the English language. Sounds easy enough. But, there are things I hear on not just our radio station, but others that make me wonder if speaking and understanding English is wishful thinking for some people, and they skate by on good faith from the government. Broadcast schools are somewhat helpful here….but one of these days I’ll share some on-line applications from BS graduates…..I once asked a potential employee if he had a valid driver’s license, and he wrote back, “No, I don’t got none right now.” Ouch. Heard a commercial the other day for a tire store on WARSHBURN Way. My mom was one that used to say she needed to WARSH, not WASH (WAH-SH) some clothes. Even President George W. Bush called it WARSHINGTON the first couple of years he was in office. Please note: there’s no R in WASH, and I have no idea why so many people say it that way, but they do. Trying to buy or sell a house is always easier with a REALTOR instead of a REALATOR. I think many folks hear the words real estate together, which might explain the faux paus, but I’ve never seen any sign that read “John Smith, Realator”. It’s REAL-TEE, not REEL-A-TEE, which might fit a tackle shop or maybe a cute name for a minature golf course. And, by far, the one I hear most often….and surprisingly from people I consider to be well-spoken…..is “SUPPOSEBLY.” Supposedly, or apparentbly, someone with dyslexia has at one point in history come across a b where a d was, or maybe there was a typo. It does combine a couple of words like suppose and maybe, or probably, and I can say that I have never seen the word “SUPPOSEABLAMAYBE” uttered or “SUPPOSEAROBABLY”. Every dictionary I’ve ever looked at doesn’t list “supposeably” in it, but as much as the word is used in every day conversation, it could make Webster’s list someday. Have a pet? You no doubt have taken them to the veterinarian. You know, a doctor that specializes in healing animals. Not a VETREN-ARIAN, which could be misconstrued as a former serviceman or woman that has joined some unpopular cult. While we’re on the subject, our former servicemen and women are VETERANS…..VET-ER-UNS is the proper pronunciation, not VETRANS. Easy sophmoric….I mean SOPH-O-MORIC mistake to make.

Now it’s time for me to get some more cold water from the water cooler. I don’t got none left in my water bottle and boy, was I thirsty. They just moved the cooler, so I hope I can find where it’s at.